24 October 2015, I knew the news unofficially.

So its been 3 days since I heard that news. For 2 days, I try to recovered myself. Try to hold my tears from burst, which sometimes I failed when I was alone by myself.
Plastering those plastic fake smiles and laughter all the time, so that no one will notice that I'm having a bad days, months or maybe for years. Fate will decide that. I dont know and cant predict what will happen in future, and neither youguys. I think I did it, coz my housemates keep wondering why I am happy. I should get an award on acting, I guess.

Its not that I dont want to share with anyone. But I think for now, just let me hold it into myself first. When the perfect time comes, eventually youguys will acknowledge about this. No, theres no need to be curious. Just let me be like this.

And today, I've got some update about the news. And still, it double breaks my shattered heart. Into smaller and smaller and smaller pieces which I might lost few pieces of it.
And today, some concern people noticed me not really okay. I told him that I'm sleepy. I think I should get double award.

For some reason, I rarely tell people that I'm not okay. Because its hard to see they not knowing what to do. And basically, I will end up comforting them, while the one who needed to be comforted is me.
See? Make sense, no?

Just, help me by praying that everything will be alright no matter what. Ameen.

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